A new study by Worcester State faculty researchers examining the impacts of “intensive parenting” beliefs on mothers found that these societal pressures are taking a significant toll on maternal mental health. The research with 27 mothers from across the country, conducted by Kathryn E. Frazier and Jacquelyn Raftery-Helmer, both associate professors of psychology, explored how mothers from diverse backgrounds grapple with and experience the intensive parenting ideology that has gained prominence in recent decades.
Dr. Frazier explained that intensive parenting is characterized by beliefs that good mothers must be constantly stimulating and overly involved in their children’s lives, putting the child’s needs above all else – even their own well-being. This ideology has become pervasive in American culture, though it manifests differently in other countries, she said.
The research team, which included undergraduate students in the psychology department, found that nearly all the mothers they interviewed were highly aware of these intensive parenting ideals, even if their own circumstances made it difficult or impossible to meet them. Many mothers reported feeling intense guilt, stress, and anxiety as a result, with elevated levels of depression documented across the diverse sample.
“The moms are not okay,” Dr. Frazier said. “This is a group that’s highly stressed.”
The research aligns with Surgeon General Dr. Vivek H. Murthy’s recent advisory on parents’ mental health, which highlighted the many stressors that impact parents and other caregivers. Dr. Frazier and Dr. Raftery-Helmer found that mothers felt pressured to find ways to provide high levels of cognitive stimulation for their children, such as enrolling them in many structured activities like soccer, violin, dance classes, and tutoring. They also found a common belief that “good” mothers must be available to their children at all times and devote almost all of their time and energy to their children.
Jackie Raftery-Helmer (left) and Katie Frazier
“We’re finding that these beliefs, this intensive parenting ideology, translate to poor mental health among parents, which then directly impacts their ability to be the type of parent they want to be,” Dr. Raftery-Helmer said. “Moms are highly stressed, and they often feel really bad about themselves when they can’t meet these unattainable standards.”
The study noted that the burden of intensive parenting falls particularly heavily on mothers with limited resources, such as single parents, low-income families, and immigrant mothers – groups that have been underrepresented in prior research on this topic. They found that even when aware of the unrealistic nature of these ideals, many mothers still felt compelled to strive for them, further exacerbating their mental health challenges.
The researchers emphasized that while cultivating alternative narratives around parenting can be helpful, systemic change is needed to truly support mothers and alleviate the pervasive cultural pressures they face. As Dr. Frazier noted, “It doesn’t make them go away. It doesn’t fix your mother-in-law’s perspective, and she’s judging you. Or it doesn’t necessarily mean that suddenly you and your partner are on the same page about how you want to parent your kids. So, there are definitely ways to address the narratives, but we need so much more to support moms.”
The study is currently in the analysis stage, with several publications expected to emerge from the research. The researchers hope that by shedding light on this issue, they can contribute to a broader conversation around supporting mothers and reframing societal expectations around parenting.
In the spring of 2022, 27 mothers were recruited for the study using equitable, inclusive and deliberate procedures to ensure the over-representation of mothers typically overlooked in the intensive mothering literature. Flyers were distributed to organizations that served communities of color, LGBTQ communities and low-income communities. To participate in the qualitative interviews, participants were required to have met the established inclusion criteria (women who self-identify as mothers, are at least 18 years of age, and can read and speak English). Mothers ranged in age from 25 to 47 years old (with their age at first child ranging from 19 to 39 years old).
Twenty mothers identified as White, four identified as Hispanic or Latino, and three identified as Asian. Seventeen identified as straight, six identified as bisexual, two identified as lesbian, one identified as pansexual, and one identified as queer. Nineteen mothers were married, three were partnered but not married, three were single, and two were separated.
There was also diversity in family household income with two participants earning under $20,000 per year, three participants earning between $20,000 and $35,000, four participants earning between $35,000 and $50,000, two participants earning between $50,000 and $65,000, one participant earning between $65,000 and $80,000, four participants earning between $80,000 and $100,000, and nine participants earning more than $100,000 (two mothers failed to reported their household family income).
This research was funded by the following:
- Worcester State University’s Faculty Scholarship and Creative Activities grant program awarded to Drs. Frazier and Raftery-Helmer
- Worcester State University’s Summer Undergraduate Research Grant program awarded to Alix Barry ’24, student researcher.
- Worcester State Foundation- Office of University Advancement Research, Scholarship and Creative Activity by Faculty Grant Program awarded to Drs. Frazier and Raftery-Helmer.
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